Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Tastes great, MUCH less filling

Yesterday at the preschool where I work, which is in a church as you might remember, a funny thing happened to me. Not that that's unusual--funny things happen all the time when you teach four and five year olds--but this one earned a big hearty chuckle.

Allow me to set the stage. It was nap time for the kiddos which is when Grace and I eat our lunch. We had two kids standing in line to use the restroom but the other children were nestled all snug in their wee little synthetic mats. The lights were off. Lullabies played on the boom box. Peace reigned in Pre-K land.

I unpacked my lunch and pulled out my can of Hansen's Natural green tea soda with pomegranate. I popped the tab, an extraordinarily loud sound in the restful room. One of the little boys standing in line leaned over to his queue buddy and stage-whispered:

"I think she has a beer."

I asked him to repeat himself but he wouldn't say it again. Normally I would just laugh and not think twice about it, but this is a child who doesn't always present the facts exactly as they happened in real life. His grandmother says he has a really active imagination.

Well, that's one way to put it.

Through the course of the year he's told us many whoppers:
1) His brother was bitten my a brown recluse spider. (He doesn't even have a brother.)
2) He went to the circus over the weekend. (Um, nope. Sorry, didn't happen.)
3) He has a dog named BoneCrusher. (Again, not true.)
4) After using the restroom, he told us he flushed the potty and washed his hands with soap. (Really? Interesting how he managed that since we're out of BOTH soap AND paper towels and his hands are DRY.)
5) That another child hit him. (When, in fact, HE was the hitter.)
6) That somebody in his family (I can't remember who) got bit by a poisonous snake.

Do you see a pattern here? There have been worse things but I won't get into those here. Suffice to say, I didn't want the little precious angel going home and telling his family that "Miss" Teble was chugging a brewskie at work. I even went so far as to take the can down to my boss's office to show her, just in case something was said.

But after I played the CYA game, I had a good laugh over it. What's really great is that I don't even drink beer. Can't stand the stuff.

However, if the kid started some margarita rumors...well, those might be taken just a wee bit more seriously. Not AT work, but certainly AFTER work!


Three Fold Cord said...

Sounds like you have an attention getter on your hands, but I have a feelin' you know how to handle that-hehe

wareaglereed said...

That is sooo funny!!!
Glad you nipped that one in the BUD!!!
Oh, yeh, I forgot you don't drink beer!!! HEHE

OK, so I couldn't resist!!


Teble said...

In the BUD! Oh April, you're such a comedian!

Shelly Conn said...

My favorite is definitely "he has a dog named BONE CRUSHER!?!" What is this child watching on TV?? Ruthie had a child a couple of years ago tell his mom that she called him a FREAK!! :) (Wacko kid!!)

Midas said...

LOL...and it doesn't hurt to be careful and clarify. Especially with kids with "active imagination"

I think beer could use more sugar, but that's just me. They should sell sweet beer like they have sweet wine.

Cori said...

teble that is soo funny. You know I went to that monday night study at church and when i dropped Reagan off at childcare I told her "Mommys gonna go talk about Jesus with the ladies and drink some coffee." When I picked her up afterward she said "Wow Mom, you sure were over there drinkin' a LONG time!" So umm, maybe we should get together for a few brewskies and talk about Jesus eh, Teble?

april said...

That is funny! Wow, I wonder what it means that the kid is a fibber.

I like to say I don't drink beer because there's no vodka in it. mmmmm... vodka.