The funniest thing I heard all week:
Dad was in his jammies, (with his coat on over them) getting ready to go out to the garage (a.k.a. his bedroom since I moved into his room) for the night. His hand was on the doorknob when he stopped and turned back to address Mom, Dan, and me.
"This is depressing," he said.
"What's wrong?" I asked him.
He sighed, hung his head, and said, "I'm going to be 62 years old in a few months and I'm sleeping out in the garage while some guy from Ohio is sleeping in MY bed. WITH MY DAUGHTER!"