Sunday, October 18, 2009

Last Day of Fall Break

...in which I shall bore you with more doctor's updates from fall break and whine about how I don't want to go back to work tomorrow.

I will say one thing about my new family practitioner: she gets labs back FAST! It used to take my doc in Smyrna at least a week to give me the results of my blood work. Not this office! I had blood drawn on Thursday. You know, the usual: checked my cholesterol, red blood cells (for anemia), electrolytes, thyroid function, etc.

Friday morning I went garage sale-ing with mom and her next-door-neighbor. I made the mistake of saying that this would be the only day all week when I didn't have to see a doctor and didn't have to get a needle stuck in my arm. Naturally I spoke too soon, because then my phone rang.

Nurse: There's an abnormality with your labs and we're going to need you to come back in so we can send another sample to the lab, STAT.
Me: Um, now?
Nurse: Yes, honey. We need to get this over to the lab as soon as possible so we can get results back today.
Me: Oooookay. What kind of abnormality?
Nurse: Your potassium is too high.
Me: Is that a problem?
Nurse: Well, maybe not, but it could be. Are you experiencing any symptoms?
Me: Huh? What kind of symptoms?
Nurse: Well, if your potassium is high and your electrolytes are off it COULD indicate a problem with your heart. Are you having flutters or an abnormal heart rate?
Me: Wait. What? My heart? No, I'm not having symptoms. (long thinking pause) Hold on...you said my potassium is too high? (laughing) I can explain that. I've been putting bananas in my fresh fruit and yogurt smoothies this week because the bananas were about to go bad and I wanted to use them up.
Nurse: Well, we still need you to come in as soon as you can.

Long story short, I had to get another stick to prove what I'd suspected: Banana OD. Darn healthy diet.

Oh, and for those of you who were feeling sorry for me because I didn't get any shoes the other day...score! I bagged three pairs of designer shoes at Goodwill for less than twenty bucks, which is still less than what I would've paid for one pair (half price) at Shoe Carnival. I also got a brand new black leather Jones New York jacket-y blazer thing which is way cool. I love being cheap.

This week we're puppy sitting mom's dog, Izzy, whom I affectionately refer to as Wolverine. She's got sharp teeth and an attitude like a wolverine, but she's pretty cute when she's not biting my fingers off. Lily loves having her here and the cat...well, the cat is adjusting. She'd just gotten used to having Lily sniffing her business, and now she's got this barking little, panda-looking Wolverine to contend with. Poor Snowball.

I really don't want to go back to work. WAAAAHHH! I loved having time off, but it makes it that much harder to go back on Monday after seven school days without students. I'm being evaluated by someone from central office on Tuesday, so naturally the state website that I need to access to write my planning information record is down. Grrr. I'm going to be really mad if I have to work on it tomorrow night during DWTS or Castle.

Okay, I think that's enough boring random facts for now. Look for more of the mediocrity that you've come to expect here at Casa de Princess next weekend. Until then, kick back and enjoy some Grand Hoochie Skank Rosè. (SNL reference from last night that still has me giggling tonight.)

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