These are just a few happy things I need to say here, but none of them is big enough to warrant its own post.
1) My BFF, the one who spanked us at Cranium on New Year's Eve, wanted to post a rebuttal about my smack talk, but she couldn't figure out how to set up a Google account so she could make a comment. Mwah, mwah, mwah!! Now I can say anything I want and she can't respond. The power coursing through my veins right now is nothing short of exhilarating. But I can't make fun of her too much because she totally wrote the January lesson plans all by her little old self and I'm basking in her goodness at work every day.
2) My amazing, super-smart, know-it-all friend Katydid came to my bra shopping rescue when she sent me a link to this place. Seriously, you should go. They have the most detailed undergarment information on the planet Earth.
3) Keeping my fingers crossed...Ten seems to be responding well to his Daytrana patch. We haven't seen any negative side effects. He's still eating like a horse, isn't staying up any later than his norm, and his skin is handling it just fine. It's a little bit hard to apply, but after the horror stories I heard about not being able to get the backing off, it's easier than I expected. I think it's helping him concentrate a little better, but only time will tell.
He's only been on it for three school days, after all, but something amazing happened in the car on the way to school today. He was daydreaming and didn't hear a conversation Seven and I were having until halfway through it. Instead of saying, "Huh? What?" like he usually does, he admitted that he wasn't paying attention. He said, "Mom, sorry, I was zoning out. Could you please repeat that? You know, if it was something that concerns me."
This is a HUGE thing for me because he usually tries to pretend that he was listening but he just couldn't hear. (We've had his hearing tested and we know that's not the problem.) Then he'll pester us to repeat the conversation, even if we assure him that it did not pertain to him. For him to admit that he wasn't paying attention, apologize, ask us nicely to repeat it, and realize that it may not have been about him being the center of the known universe, is major progress.
4) One of our students wrote his first and last name today without a name tag on the table to help him. This is also major progress because in August when he first came to us he couldn't make the first letter of his first name. Major Snoopy dancing happening here, folks! He also figured out how to fold up his nap mat by himself. He was so proud when he brought it to me and said (in his little Southern voice), "Look, Mrs. Teble. I used to not could do that." So cute.
5) My friend Jamie is in Haiti with her kids tonight. Please pray for their family.
6) My kids made Academic Excellence (Seven) and Honor Roll (Ten) on their report cards today. And I was able to do ALL of Ten's word problems on his homework tonight, so YAY me! I really thought I had a couple more years before I would have to call Dan at work to get his help with the math homework--especially since I used to TEACH fourth grade, for freak's sake--but I called him yesterday to "double check" my answers. That's code for "check to make sure I told the kid the right answers before I embarrass myself in front of his teacher." Luckily the child is smarter than I am so he can figure out the problem and I just check for simple careless errors. Like the ones I make all the time when I try to do mental math.
7) Katydid also sent me a very special surprise in the mail today. It's the coolest gift ever. Thanks, babe. You rock.
Showing posts with label ADHD. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ADHD. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Tough Decisions
Back in the fall Ten was diagnosed with ADHD. We've been several years in coming to this, but we had him tested because, quite frankly, I was at my breaking point. His teachers' opinions over the years have ranged from "You need to have him tested for ADHD immediately," to "No way, he's just super smart and as long as I keep him challenged he does fine." His mom's opinion fell somewhere between "Holy crap this kid is smarter than I am," and "Oh my God if this child doesn't stop talking and stop wiggling and stop squirming I'm going to lose my frickin' mind!"
We had him tested for Celiac disease (gluten intolerance) a couple of years ago because there's a family history. It often goes undiagnosed and can cause hyperactivity in children. The blood test came back negative. We moved on with our lives.
He managed to skate along at a magnet school, making almost all As with the occasional B with very little effort until last year. In third grade came the homework. Hours and hours of it. Every single blessed night. With arguing. And weeping. And gnashing of teeth. It was Mommy Hell. I started to wonder if the magnet school's accelerated curriculum was too much for him. That worry was shot out of the water by his standardized testing scores: advanced in every single category, scores in the 99th percentile in nearly everything. He continued to struggle with homework, but he got by, made either Principal's List or Honor Roll, and still liked school. Most of the time.
Then came fourth grade. All summer leading up to the start of school I dreaded it. I used to teach fourth grade, so I am very familiar with the beast that is a fourth grade boy. Ten (still Nine then) was not. that. beast. I also have a lot of experience with ADHD kids and I knew that he was exhibiting many of the behaviors that those kids did.
He acted like a much younger child. In fact, his younger brother had to remind him to do things constantly, things other kids his age don't need to be reminded about: brush your teeth, clear the table, put away your shoes, coat, backpack, lunchbox, etc. He had trouble with peer relations because he acted goofy, was quick to anger, argued about every little thing. I was not looking forward to the start of school because I knew this would be the year I'd finally have to do something about my child.
This is a kid who, within the first six weeks of fourth grade, went from liking school (not loving it, but liking it) to a child who hates school. Not dislikes it, hates it. Intensely. Crying before school many mornings, crying during homework, calling himself stupid. Saying he hates himself. His self esteem is in the toilet. I have a dry erase board in the kitchen, where I write the date and what's going on that day. Look what he wrote there this week :
This just breaks my heart.
So back in September we had him tested and the psychologist says Ten has ADHD. There are subsets to ADHD. The first is the inattentive child--the daydreamer. The second is the hyperactive, can NOT be still, child. A child in the third subset has both issues. Ten falls into the second group. The psychologist says that he's not inattentive, but he's extra-attentive. He lacks an incoming information filter in his brain that tells him WHAT to pay attention to and what to tune out as unimportant. He's focused on all of it: the hum of the fluorescent lights, the custodian sweeping the hall, the kid sitting next to him whose foot is tapping, the kindergarteners down the hall, everything. He also lacks an outgoing filter that serves to self-censor, so every single one of his thoughts is expressed verbally. Think it, say it. He's also hyperactive so he truly cannot control the constant motion, talking, busy-ness that drive the people around him insane.
After a whole lot of arguments, tears, prayers, yelling matches, name-calling, research, multiple doctor visits, and more shouting, Dan and I decided to give medicine a try. Well, I decided and dragged Dan along with me, kicking and screaming the whole way. He's such a good dad. We started out with Strattera because it's non-stimulant, non-habit-forming, and both docs recommended it as a good starting point. The psychologist warned us, however, that this particular drug seemed to be more successful at treating the inattentive kid than the hyperactive, impulsive kid. He was right. After two months we saw no change in Ten whatsoever so we stopped giving it to him.
Now we've come to a place where we never wanted to be--giving our kid a controlled substance.
After we told our family doctor that Strattera wasn't working, he advised us to try Daytrana. It's a patch that has the same basic medicine that's found in Ritalin. I'm so divided on this. On the one hand, I hope it works right away and we see a huge, dramatic change in Ten's study habits. On the other hand, I absolutely loathe the very idea of putting a drug into my kid's system unless it's for some life-threatening reason. Although, sometimes I feel I might just threaten his life if I can't get him to calm down. That was a joke. Mostly.
What if the drug works and he has to be on it for years and years? When will he be able to stop taking it? Will he outgrow the hyperactivity when he hits puberty like a lot of kids do? Will he have side effects like insomnia? Or tics? Will it make him lose weight? This kid is so skinny--he doesn't have any to lose. He's already a picky eater--will this suppress his appetite to the point where he won't eat anything? He has sensitive skin and eczema--will this patch hurt his poor little skin?
How am I going to manage a doctor's appointment every single month (because there are no refills on controlled substances)? It's going to cost an extra $65 per month--$45 meds and $20 copay for the office visit. How can I afford to pay for this every month? How can I afford not to if it actually helps him?
We started the medicine today so Dan could be here with me to observe any side effects. I'm just a nervous wreck about the whole thing. So far we haven't seen any changes, but it did leave a little red square on Ten's skin.
Pray for him and for us to make the right decisions. This parenting thing isn't for wimps.
We had him tested for Celiac disease (gluten intolerance) a couple of years ago because there's a family history. It often goes undiagnosed and can cause hyperactivity in children. The blood test came back negative. We moved on with our lives.
He managed to skate along at a magnet school, making almost all As with the occasional B with very little effort until last year. In third grade came the homework. Hours and hours of it. Every single blessed night. With arguing. And weeping. And gnashing of teeth. It was Mommy Hell. I started to wonder if the magnet school's accelerated curriculum was too much for him. That worry was shot out of the water by his standardized testing scores: advanced in every single category, scores in the 99th percentile in nearly everything. He continued to struggle with homework, but he got by, made either Principal's List or Honor Roll, and still liked school. Most of the time.
Then came fourth grade. All summer leading up to the start of school I dreaded it. I used to teach fourth grade, so I am very familiar with the beast that is a fourth grade boy. Ten (still Nine then) was not. that. beast. I also have a lot of experience with ADHD kids and I knew that he was exhibiting many of the behaviors that those kids did.
He acted like a much younger child. In fact, his younger brother had to remind him to do things constantly, things other kids his age don't need to be reminded about: brush your teeth, clear the table, put away your shoes, coat, backpack, lunchbox, etc. He had trouble with peer relations because he acted goofy, was quick to anger, argued about every little thing. I was not looking forward to the start of school because I knew this would be the year I'd finally have to do something about my child.
This is a kid who, within the first six weeks of fourth grade, went from liking school (not loving it, but liking it) to a child who hates school. Not dislikes it, hates it. Intensely. Crying before school many mornings, crying during homework, calling himself stupid. Saying he hates himself. His self esteem is in the toilet. I have a dry erase board in the kitchen, where I write the date and what's going on that day. Look what he wrote there this week :
This just breaks my heart.
So back in September we had him tested and the psychologist says Ten has ADHD. There are subsets to ADHD. The first is the inattentive child--the daydreamer. The second is the hyperactive, can NOT be still, child. A child in the third subset has both issues. Ten falls into the second group. The psychologist says that he's not inattentive, but he's extra-attentive. He lacks an incoming information filter in his brain that tells him WHAT to pay attention to and what to tune out as unimportant. He's focused on all of it: the hum of the fluorescent lights, the custodian sweeping the hall, the kid sitting next to him whose foot is tapping, the kindergarteners down the hall, everything. He also lacks an outgoing filter that serves to self-censor, so every single one of his thoughts is expressed verbally. Think it, say it. He's also hyperactive so he truly cannot control the constant motion, talking, busy-ness that drive the people around him insane.
After a whole lot of arguments, tears, prayers, yelling matches, name-calling, research, multiple doctor visits, and more shouting, Dan and I decided to give medicine a try. Well, I decided and dragged Dan along with me, kicking and screaming the whole way. He's such a good dad. We started out with Strattera because it's non-stimulant, non-habit-forming, and both docs recommended it as a good starting point. The psychologist warned us, however, that this particular drug seemed to be more successful at treating the inattentive kid than the hyperactive, impulsive kid. He was right. After two months we saw no change in Ten whatsoever so we stopped giving it to him.
Now we've come to a place where we never wanted to be--giving our kid a controlled substance.
After we told our family doctor that Strattera wasn't working, he advised us to try Daytrana. It's a patch that has the same basic medicine that's found in Ritalin. I'm so divided on this. On the one hand, I hope it works right away and we see a huge, dramatic change in Ten's study habits. On the other hand, I absolutely loathe the very idea of putting a drug into my kid's system unless it's for some life-threatening reason. Although, sometimes I feel I might just threaten his life if I can't get him to calm down. That was a joke. Mostly.
What if the drug works and he has to be on it for years and years? When will he be able to stop taking it? Will he outgrow the hyperactivity when he hits puberty like a lot of kids do? Will he have side effects like insomnia? Or tics? Will it make him lose weight? This kid is so skinny--he doesn't have any to lose. He's already a picky eater--will this suppress his appetite to the point where he won't eat anything? He has sensitive skin and eczema--will this patch hurt his poor little skin?
How am I going to manage a doctor's appointment every single month (because there are no refills on controlled substances)? It's going to cost an extra $65 per month--$45 meds and $20 copay for the office visit. How can I afford to pay for this every month? How can I afford not to if it actually helps him?
We started the medicine today so Dan could be here with me to observe any side effects. I'm just a nervous wreck about the whole thing. So far we haven't seen any changes, but it did leave a little red square on Ten's skin.
Pray for him and for us to make the right decisions. This parenting thing isn't for wimps.
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